When the Words Won't Come

I think I am understanding lately  how Boy Wonder may feel. I have so much to say but I can't say it. I keep getting in my own way. Post ideas listed everywhere. Half written posts in my head but when I sit down to write nothing comes. I feel blocked and jittery.

Is it because of what's going on with the school district? This waiting game of who pays for what if anything? The Boy's placement for next year has me on edge and jumping out of my skin. Snappish and no patience for little girls whining.

I could tell you that I'm running faster but it's fueled by fear and anger. That the forced rest days built into the schedule I'm tempted to ignore because physical pain dulls the fear and anger.

Sleep is elusive for me and Boy Wonder. He's been getting up at 3 am. 

I could tell you that I feel that there's been no meaningful progress for Boy Wonder for months and that it makes me angry.  Angry because I thought we'd be farther along by now. Or I try to remember that he seems happy and that's what matters most. 

I could tell you that Sweet Baby Girl is developing beautifully and typically. She is my happiest, sweetest, most smiley baby. At 15 months, she has a few words and is into everything.

Or that the Diva is living up to her name. In all her 3 year old glory, she thinks that screaming in my face will change a no to a yes. Or that potty training is optional. But she is so smart and can be so sweet. Lots of questions and I can do it myself. Or that I find her fashion sense outrageously wonderful. 

I could tell you other things but I'm searching for my words just like my Boy Wonder.

A Diva Promise or All Lies

You Say Tomato I Say Tomatoe

“Individually, we are one drop. Together, we are an ocean.”

 Ryunosuke Satoro

Strict ABA Program 

Floortime

Gluten Free Caesein Free

Special Carborhydrate Diet

Whatever he/she will eat today Diet 

DAN Doctor

No DAN Doctor

Biomedical Intervention

Lucky if they take a multivitamin intervention

 A known genetic cause

Vaccine injured

Genetic factors with environmental triggers

No clue why my baby has it

Team Curebie

Team Neurodiversity

Praying for a miracle

Praying to get through the day

Just diagnosed

Years since diagnosis

Our children are part of the fastest growing diagnosis in the world. They have autism.  Yet we fight amongst ourselves. We judge each other's choices. We call names. We are steadfast in our beliefs that our way is best.  We preach acceptance yet don't practice acceptance.

But what would happen if we all banded together? If we worked together, despite our differences? We all have one common goal. We want happy healthy children who grow in to valued productive members of society. Who will be happy and  safe long after we are gone. I don't know how we can possibly get our children where we want them to be if we can't band together now.

 

Don't you think it's time we all worked together?

 

1 in 110 DO COUNT!

I recently receive my April issue of Parents Magazine.  As I flipped through the magazine, I noticed that despite April being Autism Awareness Month there was not one article on Autism. I was shocked and dismayed. Not even on article on the early warning signs of Autism? Are these people for real?

I wrote about it on Facebook. I liked Parents Magazines fan page and called them out on it.  I received a condescending reply.  I got the other Autism Mamas on board.  We've received no real response.

We will be canceling our subscription.

Parents Magazine just so you know our children with Autism in all of it various forms are deserving of so much more then your dismissive attitude.  Maybe next year you'll do a better job. Hope springs eternal.

Three??? What????

"Divas are not made, they are born."

~Fiona Apple

Three??? How did that happen??? She is a walking, dancing, talking, laughing screamy screamer of a girly girl. She is her own person.  Stubborn, strong willed, hilarious, compassion starting to show.  Developing typically and effortlessly much to my relief.

Happy 3rd Birthday to our Diva!! Look out world she's three now!!!

Light It Up Blue

April 2, 2011 is World Autism Awareness Day. My wonderful friend, Jess,  wrote this letter to President Obama asking him to Light the White House Blue in order to raise awareness for our children with Autism. If you are so inclined, please drop by and ask Mr. President to participate.

Our children can't have acceptance till the world is aware of them. Awareness is only the first step down this yellow brick road.

Leave a comment for my boy and all the other boys AND girls like him.

C'mon Mr. President. I'll even say please.

Run The Hill

 

So the marathon training is going well.  I'm getting really quick on the flats but hills ugh. I am not a fan of running hills. They are a necessary evil.

A necessary evil.  Boy Wonder has so many of them in his life. OT, ABA, ST, PT. Making him speak if he wants anything. Interruption of stimming and self injurious behaviors. 

When he was being taught to go up a flight of stairs foot over foot, I kept saying, "Come on Baby! You can do it! One foot in front of the other!"

So as I run my necessary evils, I keep telling myself, "one foot in front of the other." I'll get myself up  those hills just like Boy Wonder.