Michael Phelps Who?

Summer Olympics 2020? Anything is possible.

Visible or The Double Edged Sword

As Boy Wonder grows older his Autism grows more visible.  No longer is it invisible to people who don't know what Autism is. As my firstborn, there's so many firsts that I haven't experienced with him. He has made more progress then I was told by that doctor he would ever make.

I often only see BW in relation to the DIVA and Sweet Baby Girl so while I notice the differences, it's my normal. Between school and his therapies we don't often get to do things with large groups of kids his own age. But yesterday was BW's preschool picnic. This included the inclusive preschool as well as the preschool with disabilities class. As they had all of the kids line up in the front of the room, my heart sank. I knew what was coming. The music therapist started to play his guitar and all the typical kids and some of BW's classmates started to sing. Not my Boy Wonder though.  He cried and stimmed and bit his hand. And the thrill of his joyful progress just two weeks ago evaporated.

I know next year when I go to the preschool picnic for the DIVA, I'll get my typical moment.  But I also know, I'll see all the kids from BW's former class and I'll remember yesterday. The double edged sword of raising typical kids and a special needs kid.

Joyful Progress in Pictures

True progress quietly and persistently moves along without notice.

~St. Frances De Sales

Without struggle, there can be no progress.

~Frederick Douglas

We attended D's little girls 3rd Birthday Party on Saturday. (Happy Birthday A!!!) Now usually Boy Wonder just hangs by the chips and wanders about not really interacting with the other kids but then this happened spontaneously and unprompted. Ready????

Spontaneous unprompted appropriate play with other kids. He looked at them and laughed along. Thanks for the wake up call Boy Wonder. Mommy's watching.

Painful Progress

 In this world, there is a kind of painful progress. 

Longing for what we've left behind, and dreaming ahead."
— Tony Kushner

We had Boy Wonder's Annual IEP review.  His placement has changed from Preschool with a Disability to Autism. He will be  in a self contained classroom next year for "Kindergarteners and First Graders."


While I'm glad he has made enough progress to move ahead, the lack of development grows all the more apparent. Sweet Baby Girl is surpassing him weekly. The DIVA is a runaway freight train so far down the track ahead of him. I know it does me no good to compare my kids. It's not a luxury I often allow myself. But for a few minutes I'll wallow in it.  I thought we'd be farther along by now but we aren't.

The school year is almost over.  BW will be attending Extended School Year. But I'm dreading the fall already. Why? Our town hands out lawn signs for all the kids starting Kindergarten. It says "School # 2 welcomes you to Kindergarten." This is not a Kindergarten I ever imagined.

But I'm not alone. Alot of us are feeling this way after IEP season.  It's disappointment and heartbreak for now but the hope and joy will come back around.

Oh Jim Perdue

Dear Mr. Perdue,

May I call you Jim? I feel like we're close like that since my son has eaten your Perdue Baked Chicken Breast Tenderloins for lunch and dinner. It's the only protein he gets some days.

You see, Jim, Boy Wonder has Autism. He is a very selective eater. Your chicken tenderloins made it past his extensive screening process. So imagine my dismay, when I have been unable to find them in the 4 local food stores that I stalk look for your product in. I'm a resourceful kind of girl so I went and checked your website and found the product is no longer listed there.


Well Jim, Boy Wonder hasn't eaten any chicken in 3 days. I tried your other products and he will have nothing to do with them.  I am currently contemplating cheating on you. I may have to go to Whole Paycheck and buy the only other brand I know he will eat.

But ya know what Jim? Life's tough enough for us. I'm sure I'm not the only Autism Mama who has a kid who would only eat those chicken tenderloins.  Could you please please bring them back? Please? I've attached a picture below just so you know exactly which product Boy Wonder enjoys.

I hope we can continue our relationship, Jim.


Thanks,

J
Boy Wonder's Mom

For My Kids on Mother's Day

Editor's Note: I wrote this post last Mother's Day. It's still relevant. I've only updated the pictures.

For the one who is proving the doctors wrong.

For the one who makes me laugh till I have tears streaming down my face.

For the one who was a total utter surprise but is a joyous smiley baby.

For making me a better person because really you have shown me what matters.

For teaching me what love is really all about.

For the smiles, giggles and utter silliness.

For sleepy hugs.

For I love yous.

For a reason to get up in the morning.

For showing me what real determination  is to each of you.

For the everyday gift of being your Mommy.

I love each and everyone one of you for exactly who you are at this very moment.

Happy Mother’s Day!

I Will NOT

let you limit his future.

let you fail to help him realize his full potential.

let you warehouse him till he ages out.

ever stop fighting for him.

ever stop loving him.

stop fighting for his right to be himself.

I won't stop ever EVER.


Well I won't back down
No I won't back down
You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I won't back down No I'll stand my ground, won't be turned around
And I'll keep this world from draggin me down
gonna stand my ground
... and I won't back down

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers